Celiac's Disease?

After expressing some health concerns--which I considered to be minor--with my endocrinologist, he decided to test me for Celiac's Disease--an autoimmune disorder where the body cannot tolerate gluten (found in wheat, rye and barley products).

The reason being: people with other autoimmune illnesses like type 1 diabetes and hypothyriodism--i.e. me--are more prone to Celiac's. Great.

Waiting for the results from Wednesday's blood test, I've been trying to enjoy my break rather than focus on how incredibly scared and angry I am...

It's not that I would miss bread or chips all that much--because there are gluten-free versions out there (albeit expensive versions)--but what angers me is that Celiac's would be one more thing in my way. One more thing constricting me. Making me worry about simple matters, like going out to a restaurant with friends. And complicated matters, like traveling to foreign places, additional health complications and even my financial stability in the future.

I dream about studying abroad next summer...but do you think there are going to be "gluten-free" products in a third-world country? Or nutrition and ingredient information at all? I'm set to run the half-marathon in May...but I don't know the first thing about which proper foods to eat on a "gluten-free" diet.

I just don't want anything to stop me from doing what I want to do. And I refuse to let it.

But let's hope all of this worry will be for absolutely nothing. And if it does turn out to be something, whatever happens happens. I'll continue to roll with the punches...Keep 'em coming!

It's My Diabetic Anniversary

March 21st was the four year anniversary of my diagnosis! I have lived with juvenile diabetes for four years. It's simultaneously unbelievable and just plain normal.

Tonight I'm celebrating with Brandon, my DFF (Diabetic Friend Forever), and cake!

One day, I hope to be celebrating my four year "un-diabetic" anniversary instead!

"Ignite the tractor beam!"

HAHAHAHAHA

Coldplay is coming to Cincinnati on June 4...

...and I'm going!! Needless to say, I'm fucking stoked.

Has a certain CD ever gotten you through a really difficult time in life? For me, that CD was Coldplay's Viva La Vida. And I figure the best way to thank them is by cheering, screaming, dancing, lip syncing, and enjoying their concert.

I can't decide which concert I'm more excited for...Coldplay or The Killers. Tough decision.

"We say our goodbyes at the gate. Nic says, 'Everything.' I respond, 'Everything.'"

-Beautiful Boy, David Sheff

SAN ANTONIO

HERE I COME!

Razia's Shadow

When I should have been studying for my Rural Sociology final exam, I was instead falling in love with Forgive Durden's Razia's Shadow: A Musical. It's a punk musical album with narration. Or something. Whatever, it's different and I like it.

Watch the music video for "Life is Looking Up" here. It's one of my favorite songs. (If it's a bit slow to upload, give it time!)

A Sun-Drenched Elsewhere

The title of my post comes from a quote by Isabelle Eberhardt, "Now more than ever do I realize that I shall never be content with a sedentary life, and that I shall always be haunted by thoughts of a sun-drenched elsewhere."

The other night, I lay wide awake in my bed, "haunted" by images of my own "sun-drenched elsewhere." From my bed, I was gazing out over Yosemite Valley - the majestic rock faces, the cascading waterfalls, the endlessness - and feeling the sweat and summer sun on my face. Now I can't stop turning the scene over and over in my mind...

Eberhardt's quote scares the shit out of me. Because I feel the exact same way. It sounds crazy and I can't explain it...but this has me imagining an alternate life for myself. One in which I am not a nurse in a hospital. Rather, I am living and working in that beautiful "sun-drenched elsewhere." Perhaps I am trying to preserve it. What if that made me happier? What if I decided to help Mother Nature rather than mothers-to-be? Would that make me a coward or a bad person?

I feel incredibly torn and weird and idiotic but I can't ignore all of these what if's and why not's circling around in my head.

So on a very unusual whim that night, without thinking anything through at all, I applied to summer jobs in all of these places:

• Mount Rainier National Park - Washington
• Isle Royale National Park - Michigan
• Voyageurs National Park - Minnesota
• Mesa Verde National Park - Colorado
• Yellowstone National Park - Wyoming
• Acadia National Park - Maine
• Ace Adventure Center - West Virginia
• Basin Harbor Club - Vermont
• Iroquois Hotel and The Island House - Mackinac Island
  
• Yosemite National Park - California

And my only justification for my strange behavior is yet another quote...this one belonging to Mark Twain:

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did.
So throw off the bowlines.
Sail away from the safe harbor.
Catch the trade winds in your sails.
Explore. Dream. Discover."

Violinist in the Metro

I came across this story here. I think it's so poignant but, also, very sad. Keep reading.

A man sat at a metro station in Washington DC and started to play the violin; it was a cold January morning.

He played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time, since it was rush hour, it was calculated that thousands of people went through the station, most of them on their way to work.

Three minutes went by and a middle aged man noticed there was musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds and then hurried up to meet his schedule.

A minute later, the violinist received his first dollar tip: a woman threw the money in the till and without stopping continued to walk.

A few minutes later, someone leaned against the wall to listen to him, but the man looked at his watch and started to walk again. Clearly he was late for work.

The one who paid the most attention was a 3 year old boy. His mother tagged him along, hurried but the kid stopped to look at the violinist. Finally the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk turning his head all the time. This action was repeated by several other children. All the parents, without exception, forced them to move on.

In the 45 minutes the musician played, only 6 people stopped and stayed for a while. About 20 gave him money but continued to walk their normal pace.
He collected $32.
When he finished playing and silence took over, no one noticed it.
No one applauded, nor was there any recognition.

No one knew this but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the best musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written with a violin worth 3.5 million dollars.

Two days before his playing in the subway, Joshua Bell sold out at a theater in Boston and the seats average $100.

Joshua Bell playing incognito in the metro station was organized by the Washington Post as part of an social experiment about perception, taste and priorities of people. The outlines were: in a commonplace environment at an inappropriate hour: Do we perceive beauty? Do we stop to appreciate it? Do we recognize the talent in an unexpected context?

One of the possible conclusions from this experience could be:

If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world playing the best music ever written, how many other things are we missing?

A few reasons to be happy...

-In a little over a week, I will be flying to San Antonio to see Adam! I haven't seen him since January 2nd.

-I got the job interview with the Resident Home Corporation. Hopefully, I nail it! I'm nervous.

-I'm getting the opportunity to shadow a Pediatric Occupational Therapist at Cincinnati Children's Hospital over the break. I want to see what it's like--because, right now, I'm considering getting my Master's degree for either Nursing or Occupational Therapy.

-New music: Kelly Clarkson's CD "All I Ever Wanted" and the Yeah Yeah Yeahs' CD "It's Blitz!"

-Running seven miles with no problems--other than some minor aches in my knees and hips. I'm right on track for the half-marathon in May!

-Next Thursday, at 1:18 PM, I will officially be done with General Chemistry. Next quarter, I'm taking Introduction to Public Health (for my PH minor), Anatomy, English 110 and Cultural Anthropology. Nineteen credit hours is heavy, but every subject interests me so I don't mind.

-I have gained more strength, I realize, to stand up to people for what I believe. Even when it's a person I love. And when that is the very hardest.

Superheros, Bodybuilders and Beasts

I'm disappointed that this exciting weekend is coming to an end...

Thursday night was Watchmen. I love people-watching. I could entertain myself for hours sitting inside a movie theater before any given midnight show and eating a box of Raisinettes.

Saturday, we had our Tri-Delta Initiation ceremony. I'm no longer a pledge but an active member. But that's not what got me so excited--it was when my parents, and all of the new girls' parents, made a surprise appearance! I was so happy to see them. The three of us had brunch at the sorority house then, as is reunion tradition, we hung out at the bookstore. And I got two more books I do not need. After spending a few hours together, Mom and Dad dropped me off to get ready for the sorority Formal.

This is the part where it gets really exciting. You know when Superman dramatically rips his shirt off at the chest? Well, that was me when I got stuck in my original dress. Yep, I was trapped in that thing after the side zipper completely broke--ten minutes before I was to be picked up for the dance. It wouldn't go down over my hips or up over my chest so I had no other choice but to rip it off in dramatic Superman fashion (not at the chest though). I kicked the shit out of that dress, picked out a better one and went on my way.



Formal had several elements of excitement, such as dancing, singing, chocolate fondu, and tanned bodybuilders. The bodybuilders were competitors in Arnold Schwarzenegger's Sports Expo which was taking place in downtown Columbus this weekend. I spotted a couple in the lobby of the hotel where our dance was being held. I even waved to one. Scary as hell.

The rest of the dance was so much ridiculous fun--my feet are still sore from all the dancing. I've never jumped so high in four-inch heels while singing at the top of my lungs. Damn you, Isley Brothers.



And today, my roommate Kelly and I ventured to the Palace Theatre downtown for Beauty and the Beast. I'd estimate that half the audience members were under four feet, dressed in gowns and crowned with tiaras. It was the most adorable thing I'd ever seen.

...I hate Mondays.

Lily Allen's "Chinese"

(Ignore the "Chinese" coincidence in my last two posts!)

I see you from the sky
And I wonder how long it will take me to get home
I wait for an hour or so at the carousel
I have a cigarette to pass the time
Cause the traffic's hell

I don't want anything more
Than to see your face when you open the door
You'll make me beans on toast and a nice cup of tea
And we'll get a Chinese and watch TV

Tomorrow we'll take the dog for a walk
And in the afternoon then maybe we'll talk
I'll be exhausted so I'll probably sleep
And we'll get a Chinese and watch TV

You wipe the tears from my eye
And you say that all that it takes is a phone call
I cry at the thought of being alone and then
I wonder how long it will take til I'm home again

I don't want anything more
Than to see your face when you open the door
You'll make me beans on toast and a nice cup of tea
And we'll get a Chinese and watch TV

Tomorrow we'll take the dog for a walk
And in the afternoon then maybe we'll talk
I'll be exhausted so I'll probably sleep
And we'll get a Chinese and watch TV

I know it doesn't seem so fair
But I'll send you a postcard when I get there

-Lily Allen, "Chinese"

Aside from the whole beans on toast thing, this song reminds me so much of Adam and I.

I miss him.

M.Ward - Chinese Translation

I've come to realize I have a thing for male musicians with sexy, deep, unique voices. I had a post on Ray LaMontagne a while back. And here is another personal favorite: M. Ward.